Thor vs. Superman is one of those comic book fights that has been around pretty much as long as both characters have tried to occupy the same newsstands. And why the hell not? They're both really powerful, wear red capes, and have bulgey muscles. DC fans thought the conflict was put to bed years ago when Thor and Supes threw down definitively in the pages of Avengers/JLA, written by Kurt Busiek with art by (my favorite!) George Perez.
It was a rarity in crossover battles, as the outcome was clear. They didn't realize halfway through that they shouldn't be fighting (Like Batman and Captain America did) and they didn't knock each other out at the same moment. Thor and Superman fought, trash was talked, lines were drawn, and punches were thrown. In the end Superman had taken Thor out.
It's true. Superman won the day then. I can't deny it happened. I can pull it out of longbox #2 anytime I want to read it and see the disgusting details even. However, just because Kurt Busiek wrote it does not make it the most likely outcome. I base this statement on two simple facts: first is the noteworthy coincidence that DC published the issue this fight took place, second is that Thor did not use half the super powers at his disposal in this fight.
Avengers/JLA (conversley known as JLA/Avengers) was a four issue mini-series published jointly by Marvel and DC Comics. Oddly they decided this would be accomplished by having Marvel publish issues one and three, while DC would publish issues two and four. Reading it, it is fairly easy to see the two publishers took turns taking cheap shots at each other. Issue one ends with Thor driving his magical hammer right through Superman's stupid face! Issue two rolls around, and in an act of pure retribution DC actually has Superman win the fight that should have ended with his charred corpse being carried off by velociraptors (this fight took place in the savage land)! What!?!?
So Thor and Superman fight, and Superman wins. How did Kurt Busiek write this in a way believable enough to have fans not rip it apart all over the internet? Thor hardly uses any of his powers. Superman hits Thor with his heat vision once, other than that it is pretty much pure fisticuffs for the God of Thunder and the Man of Steel. They beat each other like a couple of soccer hooligans, let the power of flight and centuries of combat experience be damned. HIT HIM WITH A FUCKING LIGHTNING BOLT THOR! You're the god of thunder for Christ's sake! Even Captain Marvel almost beat Superman with lightning, and he's twelve years old! Open a portal or something! Send him to limbo and let Surtur deal with it! Please, do something other than just stand there and wack him with your hammer. A magic hammer is nice, but I bet magic lightning hurts more.
Let us look at the myriad advantages Thor has over Superman. Thor is a LOT more experienced than Superman is. He was putting down rock giants centuries before Superman's father's father's father was conceived. In addition to being around and about as strong as Superman, Thor has a magical weapon (magic being on of Superman's weaknesses). Mjolnir should have been caked with Supes' brain matter at the end of issue 1, Superman should not have been able to catch that shit. Superman has the advantage of speed and flight, but Superman does not fly faster than the God's lightning. That shit is fast.
It's not that I want to ignore continuity. I just want continuity to make sense. Why did Thor suddenly forget about his other powers? I like to believe that had Iron Man, Wonder Man, and friends not intervened, Thor would have got back up, summoned a godly hurricane, and let all that filthy business be forgotten.
Next Week: Ultraman
It was a rarity in crossover battles, as the outcome was clear. They didn't realize halfway through that they shouldn't be fighting (Like Batman and Captain America did) and they didn't knock each other out at the same moment. Thor and Superman fought, trash was talked, lines were drawn, and punches were thrown. In the end Superman had taken Thor out.
It's true. Superman won the day then. I can't deny it happened. I can pull it out of longbox #2 anytime I want to read it and see the disgusting details even. However, just because Kurt Busiek wrote it does not make it the most likely outcome. I base this statement on two simple facts: first is the noteworthy coincidence that DC published the issue this fight took place, second is that Thor did not use half the super powers at his disposal in this fight.
Avengers/JLA (conversley known as JLA/Avengers) was a four issue mini-series published jointly by Marvel and DC Comics. Oddly they decided this would be accomplished by having Marvel publish issues one and three, while DC would publish issues two and four. Reading it, it is fairly easy to see the two publishers took turns taking cheap shots at each other. Issue one ends with Thor driving his magical hammer right through Superman's stupid face! Issue two rolls around, and in an act of pure retribution DC actually has Superman win the fight that should have ended with his charred corpse being carried off by velociraptors (this fight took place in the savage land)! What!?!?
So Thor and Superman fight, and Superman wins. How did Kurt Busiek write this in a way believable enough to have fans not rip it apart all over the internet? Thor hardly uses any of his powers. Superman hits Thor with his heat vision once, other than that it is pretty much pure fisticuffs for the God of Thunder and the Man of Steel. They beat each other like a couple of soccer hooligans, let the power of flight and centuries of combat experience be damned. HIT HIM WITH A FUCKING LIGHTNING BOLT THOR! You're the god of thunder for Christ's sake! Even Captain Marvel almost beat Superman with lightning, and he's twelve years old! Open a portal or something! Send him to limbo and let Surtur deal with it! Please, do something other than just stand there and wack him with your hammer. A magic hammer is nice, but I bet magic lightning hurts more.
Let us look at the myriad advantages Thor has over Superman. Thor is a LOT more experienced than Superman is. He was putting down rock giants centuries before Superman's father's father's father was conceived. In addition to being around and about as strong as Superman, Thor has a magical weapon (magic being on of Superman's weaknesses). Mjolnir should have been caked with Supes' brain matter at the end of issue 1, Superman should not have been able to catch that shit. Superman has the advantage of speed and flight, but Superman does not fly faster than the God's lightning. That shit is fast.
It's not that I want to ignore continuity. I just want continuity to make sense. Why did Thor suddenly forget about his other powers? I like to believe that had Iron Man, Wonder Man, and friends not intervened, Thor would have got back up, summoned a godly hurricane, and let all that filthy business be forgotten.
Next Week: Ultraman
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